the truth {jacob}

[liliana daine burkhardt]

[atrb=border,0,true] [/style][style=font-family: monospace; font-size: 20px; text-transform: lowercase; letter-spacing: -4px; line-height: 90%; color: #dd9922]i can lie no more, i can hide no more. Lily was reaching her 15 week mark, and couldn’t keep the secret to herself any longer. It she had a choice she might have kept the secret until the baby was born, or even years after. She knew that was impossible and she really wanted the love of her life to know, she just didn’t want to ruin his life in the process of telling him. She knew that Jacob would be an amazing father, and if the circumstances were different he would be beyond ecstatic. Lily still couldn’t decide how she felt about this pregnancy. She was happy because having a baby would ultimately be awesome. In fact she always dreamed of having a family. At the same time she worried. Liliana really didn’t think this was the right time in her life to be having a child. She was just a college freshman, and her lover was one of her old high school teachers. It wasn’t that she regretted their relationship. In fact their relationship was one of the best things in her life. A baby might complicate everything they have. There was no doubt in her mind that once people knew about the baby she was carrying, and whose it was, everything would be different. Once their secret was out they would both be treated differently. Liliana knew that Jacob would have it the worst. Since he was the teacher of the relationship, they may have both been in the wrong, but Liliana worried that people would see it only his wrongdoing. If this was to happen she wasn’t sure what she would do. It wasn’t like she could hold some sort of town meeting and say she takes ‘blame’ for what happened. Liliana didn’t see their relationship as something you could take blame for. Liliana honestly , genuinely loved Jacob. Which was hard for her to admit. Even though was a sweet and loving girl, she had some trust issues. Her parents told her she was adopted at a young age and she developed a rather irrational fear of everybody leaving her. Liliana knew that Jacob wouldn’t ever leave her, but saying the words ‘I love you’ out loud bonded her to Jacob for life. She knew that it probably wasn’t true, but she worried that a bond like that might scare Jacob away. Which was another reason she was scared to tell Jacob, fear. Liliana didn’t want to tell Jacob about the baby for quite a few reasons. The fear of Jacob leaving her after hearing the news, was actually very strong. Her abandonment issues were bigger then her trust issues and the thought of Jacob abandoning her was to intense to handle. The thought of living her life without Jacob brought tears to her eyes, but it also made her realize that it was time to tell Jacob. It wasn’t one of their date nights so she wouldn’t have a chance to see him at his house before it was time for next appointment. Since finding out she was pregnant she had a few doctor appointments, but she went alone to all of them. At week 13 she had a chance to see the baby, but she refused. Even though she was determined not to tell the father, she was so much more determined to first see their child together. Since her next appointment was tomorrow, and the appointment where she would find out the babies gender, Jacob had to be there. So with a new found determination she got dressed and ready to go talk to Jacob. Getting dressed was getting harder and harder, in fact everything in her life seemed to have been getting harder and harder. Her grades were lower then normal thanks to missing so many classes because of morning sickness. She had to be more careful around her dorm because Kaylee didn’t know about the baby either, and her sports career was officially non-existent. The note she acquired from her doctor prohibited her from playing all sports, but she could tell the her coaches were still pretty upset. It didn’t help that Liliana didn’t tell them what was wrong. Even with all that dressing still seemed to be the hardest thing to do. The baby bump was steadily growing, and while it wasn’t enormous it wasn’t exactly small either. At this moment she only had a few shirts left that would fit her, and she could squeeze into none of her pants. Her fashion style nowadays consisted of loose-fitting shirts, and yoga pants. It made her feel like she was going to workout everyday. Making a face at her self in the mirror clearly disliking her outfit she decided it would have to do, grabbed her keys off the rack her and her roommate used to keep track of their keys. Starting her car she sighed and rested her forehead on the steering wheel. The baby took so much out of her, and it didn’t help the she was extremely stressed about telling Jacob. While doing some research she read online that you shouldn’t stress. Taking deep breaths she attempted to calm down. After lulling herself into a false sense of security she drove off towards the school. Trying to keep her stress level done she turned on the radio and just pretended that she was going on a normal, everyday drive. It was hard, but she found herself at the school in what felt to be mere seconds. Taking a shaky breath she stepped out of her car and made her way to the office. With a quick and easy lie of ‘I’m here to talk to a teacher about my brother’s grade’ she got a visitor pass and made her way to Jacob’s room. Liliana was lucky enough that no one was in the halls. Since she recently graduated people would more then likely recognize her. It was also lucky that her and Jacob had once talked about his prep period, so she knew that he had a free hour.It felt so rude of her but she didn’t bother knocking, she couldn’t risk stopping, if she did she might turn back. With a quick flick of her wrist she opened the door and pulled down the shades to the window on his door. After making sure that no one saw her walk into his room she locked his door and quickly walked to his desk. Taking a deep breath she began her rant that she figured would take a lot of breath. ”I know I’m not supposed to be here, but this couldn’t wait until tomorrow. You are the greatest thing in my life and I don’t want to lose you. That’s one of the reasons why I didn’t tell you right away, but now I realize that I have to tell you.” she started before taking a quick breath and continued. ”I would’ve told you from the beginning but I also wanted to keep you safe, I was trying to protect you. If it was just me then I’d be the only one whose life would be altered. I know my reasoning seems stupid and that you might hate me after I tell you, but I can’t keep going with you not knowing.” Her breathing was becoming more shallow and she was blinking fast as an attempt to not cry. ”I need you Jacob.” she finished her voice barely above a whisper. By the end of her miniature speech she had tears leaving her eyes. Liliana didn’t know what to do anymore, she truly needed Jacob. [/style]

[jacob evan king]

there's a fire starting in my heart

reaching a fever pitch and it's bringing me out the dark

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=style,background-image: url('http://i53.tinypic.com/wb98wn.jpg');,true] ROLLING IN THE DEEP ! Classes were going rather smoothly today except for one tiny detail. The students were not exactly thrilled with Mr. King today because of those ruddy essays they had to do on World Wars 2 Holocaust. He understood in High school your mind was all over the place like his had been once. Jake never liked doing school essays but he did what had to be done. So why did he torture the students as he once had to be tortured? Simple really. The schools rules because each class had to have a certain amount of essays and evaluations each term or it fell back on the teacher and that was something Jake refused to take on, he quite loved his job a little too much for him to go losing it. The essay was a simple analytical essay on how the student’s viewed the Holocaust and how people should go about preventing an event like this from happening again. It only had to be two pages but an essay was an essay after all. Jake figured it could have been a lot worse so that eased his mind. After class, he was sitting at his desk reading some of the essays. The look he got was not a full-fledged look of being happy because the student's papers were genuinely good and interesting but also sorrow because some of the papers were so heartfelt because of how horrible the Holocaust really had been. Jake knew the essay wasn't fun for the students but he started off having them read the Diary of Anne Frank, a few lessons and pictures, and tomorrow he planned on a break and allowing them to watch the Boy in the Striped Pajamas a movie he admittedly teared up in...but it was deemed one of his favorite movies...he was a history buff after all. His mind was quickly taken off the essays when Liliana stepped through the doors. His expression immediately turned to a worried one as he walked over. Her rant was not helping matters and his mind started to spiral with the worse thoughts ever. Was she sick? Had she cheated on him? Was she moving? What was going on?! Taking quick steps over to her, he puts his hands down on her arms rubbing soothing circles around her lower arm, staring down at her. "Baby, what's going on?" but he had a slight feeling she had not heard him because she continued to go on talking about how she didn't want to lose him, how she was afraid to tell him. He wrapped his arms around her in a tight embrace, "You're not going to lose me, i'm right here..." he offered up meaning this with all his heart. The look in her eyes, and the way she was behaving no matter what had happened he knew his heart would not be able to leave her. He was much too in love with the woman standing in front of him that there was no way he could walk away from her while she was like this...to be honest, even if she ever broke up with him it would take the man forever to get over her. Pulling away from her he reached up to try and wipe away some tears from her eyes. His hand gently stroked away some of her tears as he frowned, that worried expression still etched out on his face, "Lil, what's going on?" he repeated himself this time waiting for the answer. 583 WORDS , LILIANA , OUTFIT , NO NOTES, YO!

table by california dreaming @ caution 2.0

[liliana daine burkhardt]

[atrb=border,0,true] [/style][style=font-family: monospace; font-size: 20px; text-transform: lowercase; letter-spacing: -4px; line-height: 90%; color: #dd9922]i can lie no more, i can hide no more. When Jacob pulled her into him, she completely lost it. To be honest she was just hanging by a thread. Jacob's warm embrace was just too much for too handle. Part of her felt like she didn't deserve it, that she had betrayed him by waiting so long to tell him. Another part of her knew that she needed this. She needed to be in Jacob's arms. "I could though, after you find out. I really could lose you." Liliana felt embarrassed to sound so clingy, but she really couldn't help it. Even if she wasn't pregnant with her hormones freaking out, Liliana could be pretty clingy normally. Seeing Jacob's calming eyes made her feel a bit better. Taking a deep breath she attempted to compose herself. "I really d-don't know how to tell you." her voice was weak, and tears were still rolling down her face. From the second she found out she was pregnant she looked up ways to tell 'your significant other' the 'big' news. Even when she was on the fence of telling Jacob, she wanted to at least know what to say. At that time all the articles she read seemed to be helpful, but at this current she couldn't remember any of it. It really didn't help that Liliana didn't know what she wanted to do. She knew deep down that the chance of her abortion it were slim to none. Which left her with the choices of keeping it of giving it up for adopting. Of all the suggestions, barging into his place of work was not highly suggested. In fact just dumping it on was probably the worst way to go. It was obvious that the way she started talking was worrying him. Depending on how you look at it d-doesn't have to bebad news." Liliana didn't want to force Jacob to think of it a certain way, but she did want to calm him down if possible. Looking up she made sure he was looking at her. With a shaky breath she said. "I-i'm pregnant.."

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[jacob evan king]

there's a fire starting in my heart

reaching a fever pitch and it's bringing me out the dark

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=style,background-image: url('http://i53.tinypic.com/wb98wn.jpg');,true] ROLLING IN THE DEEP ! The way she was acting was causing his emotions to go ballistic. The only circulation that seemed to be crossing his mind was her cheating on him. What other reasoning would he ever even consider leaving her for? Jacob didn't even know if he'd be capable of leaving her if she had cheated on him. He was absolutely, undeniable, in love with this girl and she had his heart wrapped around her tiny little fingers. It would kill him inside if she had cheated on him but he knew he was more than willing to try to work it out with her. The only problem was he would always have that slight fear she would leave him for someone else. He often had this fear no matter how good he was at hiding it. But she was in college and he was a grown man already started fully into his career. It would only be natural that she may someday want to date a boy closer to her in age and still in college who she could be seen with. Jake never took her as the cheating type but it was the only thing crossing the man's head at this moment and his whole heart felt twisted at the thought. The moment the words escaped her lips... 'im pregnant' it felt like ten thousand bricks came crashing down onto him. More emotions collided inside his body effecting his heart, body, mind, and he felt at any moment he might pass out. He had a mixture of relief built up inside of him because this meant she had not cheated on him. However, what did this mean for them? A baby changed everything with their relationship. It wasn't as if Jake never wanted a family because he did. In fact, he was financially stable enough to be raising a decent family as of now but with who his girlfriend was it was not as simple as let's get married, and have kids. Her being a former student really put a damper into his dreams to have a family. However, his love for her had always went above and beyond the idea of a family. He preferred to have her in his life with all the complications rather than not. "Your pregnant." the words came out soft, a little taken aback. He let the silence consume them and he looked like a deer caught in headlights. He had sworn he took all the precautions with her but mistakes happened, and this seemed to be one. Though part of him cursed himself for even considering it a mistake because how could have a baby with the woman you love be called a mistake? If anything, he should be thrilled because he'd always wanted to be a father, and the baby was made out of love, and he could honestly afford it but the timing was just all off. Actually? When could the timing ever be ok with her being a former student? If it was just not for that small detail he'd be in pure joy for this news but right now he felt like his whole career was about to crumble down before him. And as stable as he was...without his job he couldn't claim himself stable. "Were having a baby..." he sputtered out, the look in his eyes was completely off centered, as he closed them briefly taking a steady breath. He did not want to panic in front of her because just moments ago she was in tears but he couldn't help but to panic just a little bit on the inside...he had no idea what they were going to do. All their hiding had finally caught up to them it was only a matter of time until people were going to find out and the baby was going to be vivid proof that Jacob King had been messing around with a student. Except he never liked to call it that because he was very much in love with her. He stood slightly frozen as he stared at her before he tried attempting a weak smile "I'm going to be a dad" It was a bit put on but part of him was actually happy about this knowledge...but he felt like his career was officially over with this news, which was not something he was happy about. Yet when it came down to it between Lilana and his career he'd always choose her one hundred and one percent every time. 583 WORDS , LILIANA , OUTFIT , NO NOTES, YO!

table by california dreaming @ caution 2.0

[liliana daine burkhardt]

[atrb=border,0,true] [/style][style=font-family: monospace; font-size: 20px; text-transform: lowercase; letter-spacing: -4px; line-height: 90%; color: #dd9922]i can lie no more, i can hide no more. Once the secret was finally off her chest, it felt like a weight had been lifted. It was so unbelievably hard for her to keep a secret. It took a toll on her emotionally and physically. But after the weight of the secret was lifted it was replaced with another one, a possibly heavier one. Now that Jacob knew the secret Liliana knew that he would never leave her. The fact that he would never leave her meant that his life was officially over. Liliana always dreamed of possibly moving to another place, and maybe allowing Jacob to have a life, and a job. When their secret got out Jacob would more then definitely loose his job, and Liliana never wanted that. She knew that Jacob loved his job very much, and she couldn't imagine ruining one of the greatest aspects to his life. Liliana always knew that Jacob wanted a family. She knew that he would be the perfect father, but to be honest this wasn't the best time for her to get pregnant. Jacob was obviously happy in his job, Liliana was doing good in college, and their relationship was doing very well. A baby would throw a giant wrench into all of that. While Liliana was feeling pretty pessimistic about having a baby, she watched Jacob anxiously trying to see what he reaction was. She nodded when he whispered the words 'You're pregnant.' she knew he wasn't really looking for conformation, but she thought she should give it to him anyway. Watching Jacob take in the news it became obvious that he was thinking about all the angles of having a baby, and it seemed like he wasn't exactly happy. Liliana didn't know what to do, or to say at that point so she just looked down. "I'm so sorry."

[/b]she whispered. Tears rolled down her face before she looked back up as he spoke again. Once again she nodded, but this time remained quite. Hearing him say those wordes really made it sink in. Liliana knew for a while that she was pregnant, and that it was going to bring about so many difficulties, but hearing Jacob say it made it real in a way.

Jacob's feeble attempt at a smile managed to make a small laugh leave her lips. Even though Jacob was probably freaking out, he was trying to make Liliana feel better. At that moment she felt like she should try and reassure him in a way. "I c-can leave."[/b] she said half-heartedly. "I could g-go move somewhere a-and you could keep your j-job."[/b] This was the last thing she wanted to do, but she loved Jacob more than anything, and if she had to leave for him to be happy she would. When he stated that he was going to be a dad, she had one simple question. "But do you want to be?"[/b] Liliana refused to put Jacob in a role he didn't want to be.[/div][/style][/td][td][/td]

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[jacob evan king]

there's a fire starting in my heart

reaching a fever pitch and it's bringing me out the dark

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,10,true][atrb=style,background-image: url('http://i53.tinypic.com/wb98wn.jpg');,true] ROLLING IN THE DEEP ! He had sworn he took every precaution in the books with Liliana when they were intimate. He always wore a condom no matter how much of a mood killer it ended up being. He had always considered himself responsible in these matters. The man really should have known better because mistakes were bound to happen. He just never thought it would happen to him and Liliana. The only other safety they could have ever taken to prevent this was to never be intimate with each other it was something Jake always found to be special moments with her. He probably would never take back any of those moments with her because he loved her, and rather because...he did have his male hormones every so often. He had a beautiful girlfriend whom he loved, and who loved him it was only a natural thing that the two would eventually get more serious...and here was the consequences. His whole heart started to sink to the pit of his stomach as he watched her cry. Jake never liked to see woman cry and not when it was the woman, he loved. He couldn't just make this problem go away but as she continued to talk her suggestions slightly angered him. He knew they shouldn't because she was only looking out for him. But, for crying out loud it wasn't as if this was only her fault. It wasn't as if Jake was the type of man that would leave someone that he got pregnant. Even if Liliana had been a one-night stand he'd never leave her to raise the child alone. Of course, Jacob was not a one-night stand kind of guy. There was no way in hell Jacob was letting Liliana walk out that door right now and know he'd never see her again. He understood he may have to lose his job but it has always taken two to tango and just because she's the one carrying the child didn't mean he shouldn't be facing the consequences too. Besides, could he really let her walk away? Could he really go on living with himself knowing there was a child out there that was his own. A child he wasn't taking care of. And, what's worse...if another man comes along into Liliana's life later on down the road because he knew it was possible. She was a beautiful woman and there were still some decent men out there that would help raise the baby with her and Jake was not okay with that. He would never be okay with someone else taking his place in her life. The baby growing inside her stomach was made out of love, and he was not about to let any other guy take his place and raise his child. He was not about to let her raise that child alone either. "It takes two to make a baby, Liliana. This isn't only your fault so don't you dare tell me you're sorry." shaking his head at her his eyes glanced down at her stomach as he reached out to touch her belly. "Hey," he said softly, "This baby was made out of our love for each other, and I promise you I'm not about to let you raise this baby alone. Where you go I go." pausing he reached up to stroke her cheek gently, giving another weak smile, "Jobs comes and go in every lifetime, but you. You're my Lily. And, I can't just fill out another application and get another one of you. I love you. And, I promise i'll love this baby too." another small pause, and weak smile, he added in, "We'll figure this out. I promise." It was a huge promise...and a part of him was afraid he may break that last half of the promise but he knew they'd get by...they had to get by for the sake of their child now. Even if he lost his job, even if the word came crashing down around him they'd get by because it was the only way...even if it ended up with him in fast food. 686 WORDS , LILIANA , OUTFIT , NO NOTES, YO!

table by california dreaming @ caution 2.0